I haven’t had a chance to dress for about 6 months now – and it is starting to tell. I think my sore throat is indicative of me suppressing my feminine voice. My last post was about having my ears pierced – which is my one lifeline to my feminine side. At least I can touch them and feel a bit girly. I need to do something about this….
My elderly parents are needing a lot of support at the moment and I am feeling the need to escape into my feminine persona and set myself free.
Sounds so simple – yet it is very significant for me, and quite emotional. It’s something I’ve wanted to do for years – in fact since I was a teenager – but never felt I was allowed to do it. So this is an expression of who I am – a statement. Continuing my unfolding…
I spoke to my counselling group again today about my transgender situation and was again touched and encouraged by their support. I feel that I am called to be a pioneer in helping to gain acceptance for a more tolerant attitude towards freedom of gender expression, in my own small way. I am looking forward to fulfilling my part in this significant venture which many other brave people have already made significant steps in their social mileux.
Last week I shared my TG story with my female counselling group. I was scared beforehand but was overwhelmed by the positive reposne I had, so warm, accepting and loving. It was a very special moment and has allowed me to accept myself even more. It feels like a new beginning – although I’m sue there will be some rough seas ahead – but that moment will stay with me forever.
I’ve just published the rest of my book, Part 3 (chapters 23 – 30). I have been very reticent to publish it as I am not sure if it is pretentious claptrap or something worthwhile. I decided to let you decide. If you don’t like it you’ll go onto something else, no harm done, if you do like it – great.
All I can say is that I wrote it from the heart – just sat down and typed what came into my head. A bit stream of consciousness you might say.
PS I have edited the dates of the chapters back into the past so that when you click on the link to my book the chapters appear in the correct order.
This is a series of stills I took from my laptop. I put a simple piece of music to it that I like to dance to, very lyrical. When I watched the finished version it made me cry because it seemed to express who I really am inside so well.
Just sitting here in my hotel room – all dressed up – catching up on things. Just wanted to say how grateful I am to all of you who have written words of encouragement.
I feel I am progressing quite rapidly through a wonderful phase of self-acceptance. I have recently had a lovely open discussion with my wife – who is very accepting, but we disagree on some aspects – but are able to find compromises. For me it just feels so wonderfully liberating to finally accept my fem side as 100% valid.
I ate in a UK restaurant for the first time last week -and in the hotel where I was staying. In the past I may have been paranoid about being ‘called out’ but this time I really wasn’t bothered. I was prepared for the discussion about me being transgendered, etc. and having a perfect right to dress as I please. This is so liberating and empowering.
I am also having weird dreams with anima representations – and am consciously accepting more (in mydreams) and going further than I have done before. It feels like an exciting adventure.
I also realised that my higher self is feminine and I think this is what is being represented in my dressing. In esoteric science gender alternates as you go up the planes….