I was born on in 1961 having spent nine long months in a confused womb. It seemed like we were equal twins – the boy and the girl vying for expression. Our mother dearly wanting a girl and I wanting to be born into my appropriate physical body. But the gods did not allow it (or was it testosterone in the womb?) for as I developed I could see the body going down the boy route and the boy was born. I was close by in the warm red glow of the delivery room and enjoyed the first moments of life in the light after our incubation together.
We were wrapped in a warm blanket and cooed over.
The words “He’s a boy” sealed my fate for many years as my heart sank and I knew that I would have to descend into the abyss to be held captive for so long. I sensed the anguish of many others of my kind, my spiritual peers in so many other little fledgling bodies. Like the turning of a coin – slowly round and round spinning in the air floating up and down to land just one way up, never on its edge. The world only understanding one or the other.
The dice were cast and I sank and brooded, lovingly, biding my time.